shiny silver.

we went and couquer the stage, but sadly, not the judges heart. its' undeniable that i'm really devastatingly sad. and how i teared throughout the whole bus journey from rp back to vj...
but as what dear sexy hand, junhao, said, "tears we shed are for our efforts, not the results."
and that is apparently really true. flashbacks of all our hard work, sweat and pain just went through my mind throughout the bus ride. but all didnt pay off. and that's life. we cant have everything in life. after 4 months of intensive late night pracs, numerous breakdowns and die-ed, we completed the final lap of our journey, our goal. although we didnt achieve what we set out to achieve, i'm still contented by the whole journey, where we improve, mature and grew up together as one entity. and not forgetting, forging precious, close friendships that one desires to have. although i regretted not mixing enough with the other j1s' due to certain limitations this year, but i'm still glad that i have them as my juniors, who will carry and pass down string's legacy and spirit. it doesnt matter what others' judged us. the most important is having the faith in ourself as music is not for being judged. music is a medium to express and share our sentiments with our listeners. and this small fall will not make us crippled, but instead give us the energy to strive even harder, and pursue music, our life.

i would not have pulled through this whole journey myself. hence, i'm really glad that my section has always been with me. i'm sorry that i may not be inspirational enough, always nagging at you guys, and sometimes setting a bad example for you all. but, i really want to thank CELLO SECTION, for overcoming all the negative remarks and smirks from others, never failing to try even harder and putting in so much effort to improve. we might not be the best section, but i bet everyone wont deny that we improved the most. and that is what i really care. i'm actually really proud of you guys for having such a beautiful and steady tempo for the beginning of mantras and of course, great job for the mini solo for 2nd and 3rd cellos for serenade! you did a great job guys! and not forgetting. we must really thank jolyn for being there for the section, trying to be patient to impart the skills though it is a really tough job for her. and of course, my XIAODI who really lift the spirit of the section, and especially my mood. he is always thr to ans my whines and really silly requests without a complain, tolerating all my craziness and randomness. i wont have survived without you. and defintely the whole section who stand by each other all the time. as i have mentioned before, from my experience from the various orchestras, CELLO SECTION ALWAYS OWN THE REST OF THE ORCHESTRA. and that is all i really care. =)

i want to specially thank Mr Yang for his guidiance and tolerating our really lousy skills, trying to explain time and again, over again, getting our intonation right. not forgetting the really bimbo Mdm Goh who really empathise with my situation, and being thr when i broke down, encourgaing us all the way. and of course the new addition of teacher, Mr Wong, whom i always whine to when i see him around in school. and Ms Ng though she isnt in charge of us anymore, but still very concern about us and came down to support us today. and thank you to all the teachers who treated us to Fish & Co today! it must really have cost a bomb, seeing the way we order our food/drink/dessert.... i wont be surprised if it were to add up to $1k!

last but not least, i want to thank my girl's clique who is always thr to support me morally. and of course, i must really thank kenneth, marilyn and godwin for staying to watch our performance, giving us those morale support. and our seniors who came down to watch and support us and of course theo and minyao, farah and afzal who came down during our pracs to help and those seniors who wished us over the phone. and definitely all the others who wished us luck. and those who cheered us up. =).a really BIG THANK YOU to all of you!

just to let me complain alittle, i just randomly thought of something. " Can someone pass me a screwdriver to unscrew those screwed angmoh judges? " i bet everybody will agree with me. =)
i mean its like thr are only 1 gwh and 1 gold in the jc category with like a handful of bronze. AND for the sec school category, thr are like 1 gwh and 4 golds, with a handful of bronze and 2 c.o.p.
common sensically, this isnt realistic at all. but anway, i will like to thank Marilyn's words that really cheered me up alot. "I'd like to think that your school's SE is pretty good, especially your cello section. No matter whatever the outcome was of today, good job! =) "! and of course, as Mr Yang qouted from his SSO friends who were there throughout the day, VJSE is one of the most professional ensemble just from hearing the beginning of our piece. just hearing these encouragement words, in my heart, i believe that VJSE is still a GWH ORCHESTRA no matter what the results of the final judgement is. and i'm proud of NCSO too! =)

VJSE FTW!

tmr is the BIG DAY. all our sloggings and late nights are just because of tmr. the short 10 mins to showcase us, our heart, our sweat, our passion. i really do hope that we will pull the judges' hearts with our strings! =) i shall sleep early and pray for the best! cheer up guitar ensemble, the judges are just screwed! touch wood! hope tmr we will NOT have screwed judges!

it is 2.22am. ==
and i finally finished copying all the notes into the a4 size paper. and my words are super small. i guess it will be hard for me to find my pts even though its on the paper. hahas! rawr. just for the damn econs test. if not i could have been in lala land now! zzzzz. it is finally down to ONE more day. and WOOTS. can shake leg le! =P. hahas. we sabo-ed jed. so let's see how LC's reaction will be tmr when he sees the board in the el resource room, or should be my class. HAHAS! bleahs. derrick wong took our lect today, and he bad mood lor! wahliaos. went to change the slide when i'm copying. he says he is always that EVIL! X). ok. sorry for this uber random post. apparently i'm in such a zone out mode, i have no idea what i'm writing. and and and. even leslie knows i'm turning crazy from all those stress, really like a mad woman le. hahas. better than pmsing right? give ppl black face to see. i rather act crazy! and minyao came down. cools! he sorta ditched his plans and stayed with us throughout the prac! i'm so touched! hahas. and he finally knows how ben really is. its a pity that they were abit too late to change their decisions... okok. i'm just randomly typing! and that bloody china sheep!!! anyhow accuse cello section can! its like the serenade the 2nd violin and viola werent even together, and they were totally out, and we were following him and he say it is our fault!!! WTH! FUDGE siah! what do you want us to do!!! they bloody screw it up, so you cant blame us ok! ARGHS! okok. i better cool myself down....... i just realise that something bad always happen on the yr that i take my major exams! hahas! SARS during PSLE and now this PIG FLU gg around on my A lvl yr! OMG! okok. random again. arghs! i should just go sleep... nites nites!

p.s JIAYOU AND ALL THE BEST TO MARK AND JING! =D

came across this super interesting blog post by my friend...
thought of sharing this with u guys out thr! =)
probably only understandable by musicians. hahas!

~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~
Q: What do you call a person who plays the viola?
A: A violator.

Q: What is the difference between the first and last desk of a violin section?
A: Half a measure.

Q: What is the best recording of the Walton viola concerto?
A: Music Minus One.

Q: Why can’t you hear a piccolo on a digital recording?
A: Recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated.

Q: What do a saxophone and a lawsuit have in common?
A: Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

Q:Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller?
A:When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: “Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet”

Q: Why did they arrest the musician?
A: He got into treble.

Q: What is musical and handy in the supermarket.
A: A Chopin Lizst.

Q: Why did the music student have a piano in the bathroom?
A: Because he was practicing Handel’s Water Music.

Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what life in Heaven is like. Poor Max has a heart attack and dies. He manages to make contact with Abe the next day. Abe says, “I can’t believe this worked! So what is it like in Heaven?” Max replies, “Well, it’s great, but I’ve got good news, and I’ve got bad news. The good news is that there’s a fantastic orchestra up here, and in fact, we re playing “Sheherezade,” your favorite piece, tomorrow night!” Abe says, “So What’s the bad news?” Max replies, “Well, you're booked to play the solo!”
~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~ ~.~

EfficiencyFrom: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management Consultants
To: Chairman, The London Symphony Orchestra
Re: Schubert's Symphony No. 8 in B minor.
After attending a rehearsal of this work we make the following observations and recommendations:
1. We note that the twelve first violins were playing identical notes, as were the second violins. Three violins in each section, suitably amplified, would seem to us to be adequate.
2. Much unnecessary labour is involved in the number of demisemiquavers in this work; we suggest that many of these could be rounded up to the nearest semiquaver thus saving practice time for the individual player and rehearsal time for the entire ensemble. The simplification would also permit more use of trainee and less-skilled players with only marginal loss of precision.
3. We could find no productivity value in string passages being repeated by the horns; all tutti repeats could also be eliminated without any reduction of efficiency.
4. In so labour-intensive an undertaking as a symphony, we regard the long oboe tacet passages to be extremely wasteful. What notes this instrument is called upon to play could, subject to a satisfactory demarcation conference with the Musician's, be shared out equitably amongst the other instruments.
Conclusion: if the above recommendations are implemented the piece under condsideration could be played through in less than half an hour with concomitant savings in overtime, lighting and heating, wear and tear on the instruments and hall rental fees. Also, had the composer been aware of modern cost-effective procedures he might well have finished this work.

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Last but not least
Q: Why did Beethoven kill his chicken?
A: It kept saying "Bach, Bach, Bach..."
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If we were all determined to play the first violin we should never have an ensemble. Therefore, respect every musician in his proper place. - Robert Schumann.

this really struck me quite some time ago, which have been quite apparent in some of the musicians' attitudes that really saddens me. it is undeniable that everyone aims to achieve the best and look down on the weak. an ensemble will NEVER be an ensemble just with just those elitist in there. it is the effort of everyone to overcome all obstacles together, helping each other up and cheering each other on that really pulls us altogether, to be, an emsemble. i'm gratified for those who did that to cello section, encouraging us all the way even if our standard isnt up to par and on the other hand, dissapointed in those who thinks that oh-i'm-so-great-and-you-are-not-and-stop-wasting-my-time people. there is not a need to deny, as all have eyes to see who you really are. which spells superficiality.

Young people can learn from my example that something can come from nothing. What I have become is the result of my hard efforts. - Joseph Haydn

hence, i'm totally proud of my dear cello section, even with all these adversities, able to improve so much within such a short time. your efforts really paid off and i'm more than satisfied and happy. you guys had improved by leaps and bounds and i'm sure we will be the most awesome section - as ever . thank you so much for all the hard efforts you guys put in!

i really do hope that jed's wake up call was enough to wake them all up today. he is totally right.
it is dissapointing that the ensemble is slacking at this last lap. with only 4 people punctual for prac. yet again, i'm proud that the other 2 are from cello section, other than me and jed in this case! wonderful! this only shows one's passion, drive and commitment. and he is totally right to say that it clearly reflects the ATTITUDE, the j2s, sadly and the j1s'. come to think of the future generation, *shake head*. furthermore, it is worst that this is coming from people like the PRESIDENT, EXCO, SECTION LEADER(S) and the EXCO NOMINEES, making irrational and irresponsible choices. as i said so, he doesnt deserve that president post. though i may seem harsh, its a FACT, no matter how many f-ing years of leadership experience you have, you are such a loser leader. but still, i'm touched by the extra efforts put in by people who care enough, considerate enough, rational enough and RESPONSIBLE enough. great job guys, as our hard work will be paid off really soon. :)

"Music is a defining element of character." ~ Plato

onlooking today's performance, i see hard work and efforts. i see attitude. i see character. and most importantly the light at the end of the tunnel. from the practice, we can clearly see the attitude of everyone, as music dont lie. i'm sure gold with honours is within our reach, just with abit of a push at this crucial, last lap. a common goal, we strive, we achieve.


Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent. - Victor Hugo

Music is the expression of the movement of the waters, the play of curves described by changing breezes. - Claude Debussy

Music should strike fire from the heart of man, and bring tears form the eyes of woman. - Ludwig Van Beethoven

we shall touched the hearts of the judges with our melodious music,
sweat, tears and sincerity on D-Day.
ii'm sorry for the heavy note of today's post. :)

its down to just a mere SIX days. OMG!
tung is just plain crazy. suggesting that we prac till 1-2 am!
he is just a crazy, over-driven person!
i guess we will all end up drenched in bad egg or at the police station!
and its simply infuriating some guy have been two timing.
dont even know why he is the pres in the first place!
ARGHS! cant forgive anyone who will hurt my friend!
anw, back to vjse... i guess we improved abit. BUT.
i'm still not that sure that we have already secured that GOLD.
our performance is really fluctuating!
and i heard about the misfortune of swiss cottage band! suay!
rawr! totally drained man...
down with a fever yst! =(
lucky gt my rest when the sickness is just kicking in!
now i still have my geog tts and phys tuition to do! ARGHS!
its fun to just complain and nag to Mr Derrick Wong somehow!
hahas!! he is just like a little boy, like mr kwok! HAHAS!
it has become sort of a habit to whine to him whenever i see him around in school!
HAHAS!!
oh yea! free cone day was cool!
guess who i met?? shawn! HAHAS!
with....... sssshhh! his study grp mate! =P
its quite a blessing he is in vjc too somehow.
coz i think this will be the only time we talked and bull-shitted that much!
HAHAS! really can see the other side of him other than when he is at home!
and i didnt know till now, how imba his bio is!
i'm proud of you! =)
ok. craps. i shouldnt been blogging now!
pull through ppl, pull through!
i see the light man!

It is not work that kills men, it is worry.
Work is healthy; you can hardly put more on a man than he can bear.
But worry is rust upon the blade.
It is not movement that destroys the machinery, but friction.

i guess i have been worrying too much these few days...
and oh yeah! jiayou for chris gg into army tmr! HAHAS!
i'm so LOOKING FORWARD to his cleanly shaved , SHORT hair! =P

the blogskin screwed again.
changed a quick one.
needa grab a bath and go for strings.
update soon. =)


somehow some guy needs a wake up call.

its down to only just NINE days. O.O
lethargic and all.
i regret nt seeing chris long hair before he shaves its for NS!
bleahs. everyday is getting increasingly crappier.

a promise made should be kept.
if it wasnt easy to keep it in the first place.
than dont promise.

i think i just smoke through another hectic week.
today is the only day i can reach home seeing the sun bright in the sky.
unlike the past 4 days, only manage to see the dark sky. =(
my body is getting increasingly overworked.
yearning for more sleep, more rest.
though i highly doubt so...
with our standard like this. i guess i will reach home even later!
and its like only TWELVE freaking days left! =( !
such an awesome cca like dance only managed to clinch a gold.
looking at ours. *shake head sadly*!
i hope there really is a miracle in this last lap.
i hope that all my late nights are not put to waste at all.
i hope that we will pull through and see that shining gold at the end.
i hopt that i can experience yet again the experience i had 2 years back.
bitter and sweet. nervous and relief. tears of joy. happiness. satisfaction.
this will probably be my last syf. and i do hope it will only bring back gd memories.
which sadly isnt accumulating any these few months...
it wasnt enjoyable at all. totally ZERO.
but why? what is it all for??
its for my passion i have in my cello.
which was nearly killed by this freak conductor and orchestra.
but still, i will hold on to it till the end.
reflecting on my days back in ncso and payco.
i guess one orchestra should not kill my passion at all.
please grant a miracle. please.


When we lose one we love,
our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we love not enough.

my sweat, my tears, my joy, my memories.

i really hope that it will occur again, on my last syf.

looking back,i just had a whole hell of a week.
which i miraculously survived. :)
it really was a roller coaster ride for me, emotionally, somehow.
and for the people around me too. *SORRY*
but after this ordeal, i can open my eyes.
and take a good look to those who really care.
though not as if i didnt know in the first place. hahas!
yea. i've just set to say.
life isnt fair. when isit fair in the first place?
but God is fair to bless me with such wonderful friends.
given to me to pull through such unfair, sucky situations, yea? :P
next week will be a rough ride too.
friday was totally an exhaustion day.
that i ended up slping through both lectures, the first time this year.
not only physically exhausted, but mentally too.
with me breaking down at night. craps.
but for me, i guess that crying is just a release of emotion.
but definitely not a mark of defeat and giving up.
so dont worry guys! :). BUT thanks for your encouragements too!
thanks for all the pats, all the sms-es, all the fb msg-es.
we will pull through this together, wont we?
oh craps, my neighbours are a whole bunch of noisy ppl.
its already 12am! and they are still making a whole hell loads of noises...
but i guess people do gt carried away when they are accompanied by their love ones, dont they?
hahas. its just like us when we have a whole bunch of fun.
forgetting about those around us. =X
anws, i shall wish my dear twin cousins,
a happy, bashing 20th birthday! ^^V!
omg. breaking out of teens. it feels that you are forced to grow up than.
i can't wait to meet them after a's to hang out though!
oh craps, the zzz monsters are here! *yawns*
p.s: jiayou leslie, my dear xiaodi! YOU CAN DO IT! :D
and just to add another thing..
I SUCCESSFULLY NOT TALK TO BEN BEK FOR MANY DAYS,
TREATING HIM LIKE A TRANSPARENT GLASS.
and...
I'M LOVING IT! =P





Love puts the fun in together,
The sad in apart,
The hope in tomorrow,
The joy in the heart

life is unfair, as usual.
i accept the b, but dont accept that HE got a.
when he didnt even contribute as much.
when his op wasnt better than ours.
when LC say that those he marked up gt B'S!
i seriously didnt expect i will break down again.
though i say i will accept the B in the beginning.
before i even get hold of the results.
but, its just isnt fair that the whole grp a big fat B except him!
RAWRS!!!
pw is just the worst marked sub ever, EVER.
where the minority ppl who slack gt shiny A's.
while the minority ppl who worked hard gt B's.
fine. this is life. no matter what.
i'm sorry for throwing my section behind today.
and, probably just alittle warning...
my emotional state isnt stable these few days.
so i dont know when anyone can just spark my tap.
idk. probably not. my eyes are dry.
my tears cant come out that easily anymore...
my eyes are pain.
i just want something to cheer me up NOW.
probably i need just a little alcohol...

i broke down.
my tears just rolled uncontrollably.
quite expected since everything has been snowballing.
and it was just simply suay that china sheep sparked it.
i'm grateful to those pats.
but i'm sorry that i'm not a person who will get better with pats.
but i'm grateful as ever.
my eyes are too pain to close now.
though i'm mentally drained. hais!
everything just gt so much worst today.
probably coz yst gt chris. hahas.
brig and char, dont scream!
but today, my mood was terrible.
really bad. really bad. that it was so suay.
that i just break down like that. just like that.
tmr is the day we collect our pw results.
craps! i hope i can get an A. doubtful though. =(
and we are having peranakan cooking with LC tmr~
!@#$%^&*()#$%^&*($%
i feel like adding laxative in his food. hahas!
ok than. i will try to slp.
and hope i will get better by tmr...

just to deter awhile, since i need an outlet...
i still cant believe he cant give up when he knew this will be the outcome.
what is the point of blaming others, when i told him not to give up his future.
you decided it. nobody forced you. and i had already warned you.
craps. cant you just get a hold of your bloody life?
you are just acting like a kid, for heavens' sake!
falling in and out of love is a norm, and love is not everything in life.
it will be good to have it, but u will still live without it.
dont act as if it is dooms' day. coz it ISNT.
pls wake up, for goodness sake!
or you will just be pulling innocent others into your misery too.

my life is gg in circles.
study,cca,tuition.study,cca,tuition.
without BBF, i guess i can concentrate better.
i need a breather, seriously.
i'm feeling so bottled up and stuffy.
furthermore, cca is making it worst.
with the gg to be increased pracs & that @#$%^ china sheep.
i just want to cry. cry everything out.
i know that syf is in like 24 days. but i just dont see the spirit.
i dont see IT. i dont sense IT. the IT, the DESIRE.
and this became the spiral of decline.
when everyone's morale gets worst.
with tiredness and resentment.
whr and how can we insert this hunger to achieve.
whr and how can we insert them with motivation. for the last lap?
WHO can do it???
idk. i dont seem to be in the right stand either.
since, i cant help to feel disgusted thr.
my only comfort: my cello, my laughtet, my xiaodi and SOME fellow nice strings ppl.
the rest: forget it. just reign yourself in, FOR GOODNESS SAKE.
craps. i'm not in a good mood at all.
i thought my ipod touch would be my new comfort. but apparently. HAIS!
i'm just glad that i completed my econs csq, statistics tt, vectors tt, binomial tt. =)
as for my back, i hope it will get better.
i shall stop here and go down and pass ken his scores.

why, how, when, whr. somebody pls enlighten me.

friends are people who are thr to give u hand when u are in need.
this really struck me, make me realise who are the ones who really care.
like seriously. i mean no matter how much u crap and have fun together.
eventually, they may not even be true friends.
they are only called good weather friends.
so i'm quite touched today, from the bottom of my heart.
that i am really glad to know leslie, my dear xiaodi.
he is the one who always help me keep my cello...
pack my stuff, run my errands, blah blah blah.
without any complains or whatsoever.
especially today, when my back hurts, and he helped me take my stuff to the car.
i'm seriously uber touched by how far one can go.
hahas. he even joked that he is my personal assisstant. =P.
i'm seriously glad that i am fortunate to know him. =)
oh yea. and of course out to the other people...
like jiali, delia, jed, qiaoni, and others...
who always help me take my stuff coz i have difficulty rolling my cello. =)
i hereby give you all a big THANK YOU! =D
i really appreciate all your help... and oh yeah.
before i frogot, i have to thank hong chew for helping us take all our thick, heavy books. =D
hahas. and thanks for letting us bully you. HAHAS!
and of course, not forgetting my wonderful girl's clique. ^^!
where we constantly encourage each other and comfort each other,
while at the same time giving each one ample individual freedom. =)
and now. i am missing my fellow pri school besties and my animal farm! =(
and i need to wait for another month for my ipod touch. TT. craps!